My husband won't go to bed without me. He has started wanting to go to bed earlier each night like 5 or 5:30 p.m. He gets very angry that I don't want to retire so early. What to do?
Answered by David Troxel
My husband won’t go to bed without me. He has started wanting to go to bed earlier each night like 5 or 5:30 p.m. He gets very angry that I don’t want to retire so early. What to do?
Arguing or pushing back is probably not a good strategy. Can you apply some finesse and get into bed with him until he falls asleep? Then get up again to have some of your own time?
Another strategy would build into your evening some kind of ongoing ritual—a happy hour, 30 minutes of a music program, or some kind of evening chore (organizing photos or having help fold laundry), making a to-do list for the next day. Sometimes people go to bed too early when they are bored.
My final suggestion is to play some lively music after you’ve had dinner—an evening concert so to speak. Music can lift mood and create energy and we know persons with dementia enjoy music even late into their journey.
Best wishes. I hope these ideas are helpful.