• Know your role.

  • Know your goal.

  • Figure out who should do the talking.

  • Picture the person’s conflict style.

  • Pick a pleasant time.

  • Rehearse your tone.

  • Try gentle, indirect route.

  • Empathize.

  • Let the person know they will be helping out.

  • Give honest, detailed observations.

  • Share insights into the person’s conflict-coping style.

  • Ask for a preview.

  • Be sympathetic to the person’s perspective.

  • Use terminology that feels right to the person.

  • Emphasize the advantages.

  • Normal incontinence.

  • Keep invoking the doctor.

  • Empathize.

  • Switch cold turkey.